stillness

missing it....so much...these times are hardest...

There's so much I wanna share, say, hear...but really, although I gave up control, I never had much control anyway.

I've always wished there could be more, but it stinks to lose what little I had.

Disappearing...does it mean anything? Any noticing that I've vanished? Any thought, memory, wondering?

I fear that I'm the only one who cares...remembers...wonders...longs...aches...

And what haunts me....smiles, laughter, teasing, words, stares, glances, knowing, sharing, sunshine, moonlight, reminiscing, sadness, frustration, explanation, pleading, reassuring, words, hearts, souls, connecting....

Always lurking...never ending...forever...