forward

So I am determined to look forward. No more regretting the past or being discontent with what I have or where I am. I am here, right now, for a REASON. God has good plans for me. I'm sick of doubting that.

Today, despite being thrown a huge whammy in my gut yesterday regarding a past relationship, I feel a general sense of peace. I don't really know why. I've been angry, I've cried, I've vented....but now...I feel calm. Resting in God's will. KNOWING I've done the right thing. (And referring back to those Psalms from the other day that talk about enemies...ahem.)

If there's one thing I've learned in the past couple years, it's that God has my back. He works in ways I cannot see. He whispers my name in positive ways to dispel any doubt. He brings truth to light. He has established foundations and bonds that can never be broken. And will never be understood by the human mind. And can never be destroyed by anyone. In my peace surrounded by pain, I am still awestruck at what He's done...and hopeful about what He's yet to do. I don't have the answers. I still don't know where my next step will be. But I can once again take a deep breath & say "Okay Lord...You lead me. You take over. I'm giving You control."

And I sit here in the silence, waiting on Him.

I remember the days of old. I ponder all Your great works. I think about what You have done. I reach out for You. I thirst for You as parched land thirsts for rain. Let me hear of Your unfailing love to me in the morning, for I am trusting You. Show me where to walk, for I have come to You in prayer. Save me from my enemies, Lord; I run to You to hide me. Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God. May Your gracious Spirit lead me forward on a firm footing. For the glory of Your name, O Lord, save me. In Your righteousness, bring me out of this distress. In Your unfailing love, cut off all my enemies and destroy all my foes, for I am Your servant. (verses from Psalm 143)